Losing you to him
by the lights of paris
Summary: "Don't leave me" "I'm sorry but I have too" "No, you don't" "Yes, I do Chuck" Chuck\Blair major angst. Blair\Nate and Blair\Dan hints. One shot. Mostly Chuck's POV.


**Title: **Losing you to him

**Summary: **"Don't leave me" "I'm sorry but I have too" "No you don't" "Yes I do, Chuck" Chuck\Blair major angst Nate\Blair and Dan\Blair hints.

**Authors Note: **I'm in a really bad mood at the moment and everybody always writes Chuck\Blair\Dan triangles now when the actual triangle has and always will be the Nate\Blair\Chuck triangle because we know for a fact she _loved_ Nate but she had _feelings _for Chuck. The whole Dan\Chuck\Blair triangle is honestly just pathetic and I'm including NAIR and DAIR in this as well as CHAIR. idk even know what I just wrote. Blair comes across really bad in this but yeah, I don't hate her or anything but it just seemed more fitting for the story.

**Warning: **No happy outcome and I haven't proof-read this at all.

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing.

* * *

The cars flew past, racing, speeding, rushing. They were all a blur; just another object but inside every single car was a story. Maybe multiple stories. A girl's mother recently died from breast cancer. A man meeting his grown-up son for the very first time. A woman about to bring a new life into the world. A boy who is conflicted between his feelings for this girl and this boy. A girl who doesn't want to live anymore. A boy who has everything he ever wanted. A woman's just lost her the love of her life. A man has just lost his. A girl and a boy are bringing home a brand new puppy. A boy has recently made a new friend. Tragedy and Joy. A story that only a few get to hear. Chuck can barely think about all the different stories and how in some weird, twisted way they could be connected to him like he usually does but all he can think about are the divorce papers lying in front of him. His wife- his soon to be ex wife's signature on them. He gulps and picks up a pen. He doesn't want to do this but if it would make her happy. It seems like that's all he ever wants in life anymore, _for her to be happy. _It's like he's breathing for her, living for her and not himself. He sighs and rubs his forehead. With one last swipe on the paper, it's done. He packs it all back up and leaves it on his desk. He'll let her be his wife legally for one more night even if she was curled up at _his_ hotel with _his _best friend. He didn't even want to think about what they were doing.

He doesn't bother changing out of his clothes, he just dives straight into bed. The covers becoming tangled up around him. The bed feels cold and hard and it doesn't feel like his own. It hasn't for a while, not since she kissed Humpty-Dumpty last year. He remembers it clear as day. Humphrey had turned up on their doorstep, begging for Blair to take him back. He closed his eyes not wanting to think about what happened next. He inhaled a sharp breath and tried his hardest to go to sleep but it was impossible. The conversation he had with Blair a few days ago was still replaying itself over and over.

_"Hey, how was work?" Chuck asked Blair as she walked through the front door, barely glancing up from his work proposals to look at her. She sighed and plopped herself down next to him. Usually she would curl up next to him and look through the proposals with him but not today. Instead she sat as far as possible away from her, her hands sat primly on her lap and her knees were pressed together. Chuck looked up to find her looking at a vase of flowers._

_"I can't do this." She started, running a hand nervously through her brown curls messing them up. Chuck could feel his jaw drop; she didn't mean, what he thought she did. Did she? He had fears of her leaving him ever since last year when he saw her kiss Humphrey but when he brought it up, she told him she just wanted him gone and knew it was the only way but now this?  
_

_"What?" He finally managed to ask. She sighed, but didn't turn around to face him. She didn't move an inch.  
_

_"I want a divorce, Chuck." She stated firmly. Her voice cold and calculating.  
_

_"Why? Why do you want a divorce?" He asked quietly. It was in his nature to yell and scream and run but not today and honestly he couldn't muster up the courage. She was his everything, her and their children.  
_

_"I'm not happy." She whispered. It was a lie, he knew it, she knew it. They were happy together, weren't they? He thought they were. He was happy at least but was Blair, actually un-happy. He put his head in his hands and shook his head, pulling at his hear.  
_

_"I can't believe this!" He shouted. He knew he would wake up Grace but he didn't care. "Your not **happy?**" He shouted again, standing up this time. She simply nodded her head and reached into her bag, he knew straight away what she was pulling out: divorce papers.  
_

_"Chuck," She started, struggling for words. She passed him the divorce papers and he took them reluctantly. "I'll always love you, Chuck. But I just feel like we've tried and failed. I'm truly not happy and," She took in a deep breath. This was the hard part. "I've been cheating on you for quite some time." She whispered. Her eyes feel to the floor, ashamed. She was ashamed. She had been banging his best friend for the past four months and Nate had finally talked her into breaking it off with Chuck. She could feel Chuck's face falling, she didn't have to see it to know it was happening.  
_

_"You have got to be fucking kidding me." He hissed. He couldn't believe the words he was hearing. She had been cheating on him, she was leaving him for somebody else. He was losing her to someone else. He knew he was never good enough but this was a whole new level of hurt. She had committed to him for seven years and now suddenly she decides she isn't happy? After they had started a family, after all this time?  
_

_"Don't leave me." He pleaded. He didn't care if she had cheated on him, or what she had done. He knew he should but he was too heartbroken to be furious because this was really the end.  
_

_"I'm sorry but I have too." She responded, swiftly picking up her bag and heading to the elevator.  
_

_"No you don't." He stated, his voice rising once again. She shook her head, slinging her bag over her shoulder.  
_

_"Yes I do, Chuck." Those were her parting words. He didn't even start to think about what this would mean for the children until after she had left.  
_

* * *

Chuck woke up the next morning feeling like hell. So far nobody knew that he and Blair were getting a divorce and he honestly needed someone to talk too about it; and pretty much talk about what a bitch Blair was being about the whole thing. His first thought was to call Nate but then he remembered he was the his wife was leaving him for. Not enough curse words in the world could satisfy him at this exact moment, just the thought of Nate stealing his girl away from him tore him to pieces. He didn't even think about the fact that Nate had been dating Blair a long, _long _time before him. He slipped out of bed and walked down the hall-way to his youngest daughters room. He twisted the knob and stood at the doorway, smiling. He didn't have Blair but he had four wonderful children with her. Grace started crying not long after and Chuck was quickly at her side, scooping her up into his arms. He placed a small kiss on the girls head. Last night he might of thought he lived for Blair but that wasn't true; he lived for his children. He rocked the eight month old back and forth and soon enough her crying died out. Minutes later his eldest child had appeared at the doorway.

"Daddy. Where's mommy?" The six year old asked him. He had told the kids that Blair had gone on holiday with Aunt Serena and she would be back today. He hated lying to them but he honestly didn't know how to break it to them that he and Blair were getting a divorce.

"I'll explain everything later." He told Henry, putting Grace back in her cot once he saw her asleep. He walked over to him and gave him a small hug and a peck on the head.

* * *

It had been two years exactly since the divorce and Chuck hadn't managed very well. He had managed not to run away or try to kill himself when it was announced Blair would become an Archibald. He tried his hardest not to break down when it was announced Blair was pregnant with Nate's offspring. He tried not to be heartbroken whenever he saw them together but it was breaking point when Blair asked for full custody of the children. _And won._ That's when it happened, two years after the case was first started, Blair was given full custody over Henry, Audrey, Rhett & Grace. On May 11th 2021 Chuck Bass attempted to kill himself. He hadn't seen his babies in exactly two months. Blair refused to let him even visit or take them out for the day. He had found a piece of rope - it was no scarf but it would work better - and made a noose. He was dead for five days before anybody noticed; before anybody found him. He had taken his own life because he had nothing to live for. Had nothing to come home for except a empty house. Chuck had never believed in the afterlife, he had never believed that you went somewhere when you died, had never believed in religion, he didn't even bellieve in love until he was in his late teens. He had never even loved his father, only seeked his approval and he never got it. In his last moments he thought he could be reunited with his dear old dad. He honestly didn't want too. He only prayed that there was no afterlife and he was lucky because there wasn't. He was lucky because he didn't have to sit around and watch his children fall to pieces, to watch his ex-best friend blame himself, to watch his adoptive mother check herself into therapy, didn't have to watch his sister go back to drugs, didn't have to watch as even Humphrey cried, didn't have to watch as the girl he loved became depressed and alone. He didn't have to see himself being buried into the ground.

He never got to watch his children grow up. To watch them start families of their own. He didn't help them with homework or with their problems which he had said from the start he would do.

His children apart from Audrey and Henry barely even remembered who he was. Later on in life, they were told the story about the great Chuck Bass. They were disgusted, revolted, and swore to never tell a soul that they were related to such a man. They never knew the man he could be, the one who was loving and kind and gentle. The one who didn't do drugs and have meaningless sex with meaningless women whose names he didn't care to ask for.

* * *

"Do you Henry Harold Waldorf-Archibald take Catherine Mya Sparks as your lawfully beloved wife?" The minister asked. Henry, now twenty-three and the spitting image of his father nodded his head and choked out a yes. His eyes never leaving his beloved. The minister asked Catherine the same thing and she responded the same way, a huge smile on her face. Blair wiped away the tears from her eyes and clutched her husbands hand tighter. Her son was marrying a Sparks. If Chuck was here he would of been appalled! Blair's face fell. _Chuck. _Chuck Bass who was now deceased. Who's children didn't carry his last name. Her heart sunk to the bottom of her chest. She had always blamed herself; she knew it wasn't her leaving that made him kill himself but her taking away the children. At the time she had thought it was the right thing to do, she feared he would get involved with drugs and women again and become who he was when he was sixteen but she knew now it was wrong- that she was wrong. Nate didn't even notice the change in her emotion, whereas Chuck would of. Suddenly everything seemed wrong. She had never thought twice about leaving Chuck, but now on the day of her son's wedding, she was having regrets? Having regrets when it was too late? When he was already gone. She felt her chest beating faster and faster and faster. She felt her head spinning, she shut her eyes, she, she just, couldn't take it anymor-

* * *

With no afterlife Blair and Chuck never met again, never talked again, never said the Sorry's that they should have, never saw eachother smile again, never say one another laugh again. They didn't ever have a time to mend their broken friendship, their broken relationship, their broken hearts. After five months of marriage Henry and Catherine filed for divorce. It was tragic really, how no marriages really worked. You thought you loved someone when you really didn't. You just find yourself not wanting to be around them any longer, no longer feeling attracted to them, no longer caring about them. Sometimes Henry found himself thinking about that. He never remarried but he did find another girl, another three girls. He found himself giving each of them an offspring and being the best father he could. His brother's marriage failed and so did his youngest sisters. They both lasted longer then he ever did and both produced children to their spouses. His other sister, Audrey, never married but she did manage to make a relationship work. For 34 years and it was only cut short but her girlfriends sudden death. As Henry grew up, he found himself thinking more and more about his biological father and he found his memories of him fading away. He had loved his father so dearly and when the news got to him he had taken his own life it had killed him. Now and again he remembers certain memories, certain moments. Some of just him and his father, some of just his father and his mother and some of the whole family. He sometimes find himself wondering as he aged why his parents divorced but with both of them dead he could never ask them. He hoped there was an afterlife, one they both were in, and so one day he could ask them all the questions he had ever wanted too. He had once tried asking Nate, but the only reply he got from him was "They didn't love eachother anymore. It's not rocket science, just think of you and Catherine."

**"I love you"**


End file.
